Yet again, I've fallen behind on my blogging. I seem to either have too much to write, or perhaps too little... and sometimes I just feel self-conscious about putting it all out here.
It's the morning of Christmas Eve. All week, I haven't been able to get up as early as planned, but today, I woke up wondering about friends I've made over the years and lost touch with. (Facebook just doesn't count). We had dinner last night with my best friend from high school--the one person from that time in my life I've kept in touch with--and I dreamed that I ran into a whole party of my old high school friends. It may have had something to do with seeing people's photos on facebook, and actually seeing and talking to another friend last weekend, too.The past few months have also seen me reflecting a lot on the past few years-- but perhaps I'll leave that for another post, maybe a "farewell 2010" post next week.
I'm not sure why I lose touch with people so easily. Does everyone experience this? My lovely wife seems much more able to maintain relationships-- or at least try to--partly because she spends so much time on FB, but shhh, don't tell her I said so. To me, I find myself constantly meeting new people, and I give myself the excuse that it's better to have a few friends that have shared interests and are "in the same place in life". I'm not so sure about that anymore. Am I lamenting a lack of friends, or feeling sorry for myself? Certainly not... especially since I'm sure at least a few of my friends are reading this... :)
I've been working on a post about how much I love my run club (I will post this before the new year!), and a big reason is it's such a great way to get to know people who ultimately have a pretty major common interest- running. In some ways, blogging is a great way to meet new people, on a strangely intimate, yet sometimes very surreal way. New jobs, new neighborhood, all bring new people to meet, and each time, with each encounter, you have to choose how much of yourself to give, how much you want to connect.
But I do really wonder about some people with whom I've lost touch. People I went to school with since childhood. People I once worked with. People I partied with. Sure, some of them are "on Facebook"... but really, I don't think that counts. At least not for me-- I don't check status updates regularly, and not everyone is inclined to post about themselves, and if they do, it varies from the mundane to the ridiculous, to the political, to the odd funny clip. Is it the same as sitting down and having coffee or a beer with someone and catching up on a few years of missed time? I think not.
So in case you haven't noticed, I'm feeling a little nostalgic. If any of my old (or new!) friends is reading this and wants to (re) connect, I'm always free for a coffee or a beer (but not at the same time). I'll buy. jarrett dot nixon at gmail dot com
... And in other news, the post-accident whiplash treatments are working, and next week I'm back in the pool. I can't believe how much I've missed swimming!!!
Glad to hear the whiplash treatments are working; soft tissue injuries can be brutal to diagnose and treat.
ReplyDeleteI know people, adult people of respectable years and all, who have been friends with some of the same people since the first day of school. Amazing to me. One of my school changes was in grade 8, and I wouldn't know how to even begin to find any of the people from the old schools. Even high school buddies are hard to find. I've tracked a few down on facebook, but they live a long way away, so it's not like you can jumpstart the friendship over beer. I dropped a lot of people out of my life when I moved to Calgary in 1980, but have since picked up new friendships. A little while ago I found a phone list from a place I worked many years ago. That was a wash of memories!
I take the position that a friendship is a mutual thing. Takes two to tango and all that. So to some extent if a friendship has dwindled, it is as much the other person's doing. Don't forget that everybody is so busy with work, family, and their own interests that it's sometimes hard to keep up with other people. After all, that's work, when it's so easy to turn on the TV or surf youtube.
The problem is that a chuckle at a funny video lasts a few seconds. Maybe it gets shared with someone nearby, but likely not. But an actual conversation with another person, face to face, is something that is shared and real, that people will remember.
I agree with Keith- friendship is a two way street. I have lost friends over the years for no reason other than we drifted apart (literally and not).
ReplyDeleteI often dream about old friends too... it's weird!